Last night i started to read the book Eat Pray love by Elizabeth Gilbert. I’ve only read about 30 pages, but i can tell it’s going to be good. A friend of mine has already read it and highly recommended it. What i’ve gathered so far from the book is that it written by a women, in her thirties, who has a seemingly perfect life, and then over a period of time decides that she is not happy, and needs to find a way to fix her life. She makes changes which lead to a bitter divorce, a heart breaking love affair, and eventually taking a year to live in 3 different places, Italy, India, and Indonesia.
I feel like it’s so enlightening to read other people’s experiences. I’m hoping to get some insight into dealing with my own life.
I titled this addiction because when she talks about the heart breaking love affair she calls it an addiction. I found this to be incredibly true. I mean no i no experience with addiction, so i can’t say for sure what it’s like to over come one, but from what i hear i think i can understand. It’s when that one constant in your life is suddenly gone you cling to it anyway you can. That’s what i was like with Jason. I needed him, he was like a drug and without him i was helpless. I was irrational, and couldn’t find a way to let go. I wanted to do anything to get him back. I needed him. With anything going cold turkey is hard, but after time it becomes easier. I don’t think i’ve overcome my addiction completely. There are still times where i think i need him in my life, and wish terribly that he was still there for me. I wish that i could call him up like i used to and just talk and tell him things i don’t want to tell anybody else.. but for him to end things meant having to cut me out of his life, cold turkey. I don’t know what i was to him. I can’t say how he was dealing with things cause he wouldn’t talk to me. I wasn’t in NY or near him to see him or run into him.
So i don’t know how he is dealing with it… all i can do is try to deal with it by myself. Maybe this is what i need, some time by myself. To discover who i am again. I don’t think i really lost myself when i was with him… but a large part of me was consumed by him. He left a void in my life, and i’m still trying to figure out how to fill it.
I’m excited to read this book. I want to see how she copes with her life, and the changes that are occurring for her. I know life is uncertain, and we can’t always control what is going to happen, but it’s not always that easy to accept. And that’s what is hard.. learning how to accept things and move on.
